The beginning...Our wedding day

Yay!!! My 100-th post! In honor of that, I will be blogging about our wedding. 

I have been busier than usual so I apologize for not getting a chance to blog this as promised a couple of weeks ago.

J & I were officially married on a fine spring day in April 2011. The day after our Nigerian ceremony.
Funny enough, J & I got into an argument the night before because he was "complaining" about having to entertain his family while I was working hard to clear up things after our Nigerian ceremony. Mind you, by entertainment, I mean drinking with his friends and family...oh the horrors! He has since repented and besides, I knew he didn't mean it :-). Anyways, I digress...
I found out the day after we were married that J wasn't sure of what state I'd be in (mood-wise) on our wedding day. I on the other hand was completely sure I would be having a fabulous day. 

It was a fabulous day indeed...if you don't count the very very very slow hair stylist. We got there at 7am and I didn't leave until after noon! I had to rush to shower and have my makeup done before the photog got there. My sister took this pic cause at this point, I was PISSED!

Then it was on to makeup. I think she did an awesome job! My makeup held up the entire day/evening. 

Me in the limo with my dad and mom.

The girls all wore different shades of red shoes. They looked awesome in the actual professional pics.

Having a quiet moment before walking down the aisle.

Both my parents walked me down the aisle. I am so glad I made that decision to have them both do that. I figured since they both had a hand in raising my, they should both be there to "give me away". My mom was really honored by that. Side note: I made each and every one of those pew pomanders! That was definitely a labor of love :-).

The back of my dress. It was a cathedral length train. That dress was HEAVY! At the end of the night, my stomach felt tighter! I didn't even have to wear a girdle or do sit ups for that :-).

Both sets of parents praying for us.

I am officially a Mrs!!  Yes, I was dancing and hubby as usual was smiling at me. This was pre-goatee...look at my very hot hubby! :-). He looked so dapper in his tux.

Ceremonies over. Now time to PARRRR-TAY!!!

My father/daughter dance. I enjoyed dancing with my dad. 

Yes, we had a change of clothes. It was time to dance dance dance!!!

The cake was DELICIOUS! The top layer was carrot cake. My favorite. It was GONE by the end of the week. Considering we got back from our mini-moon that Wednesday, ummm...it took me 2-days to eat the entire thing. YES I know, gluttony is a sin. The cake was sinfully goooooodddd :-).

DIY ITEMS:

Like I said earlier, the wedding was a labor of love. As most of you know, weddings are EXPENSIVE and since we had 2, it was twice as expensive. So to ensure that ALL of our vendors were paid before or on the day of our wedding, I took on the task of making a lot of items myself. Hubby helped quite a bit but we weren't living together so a lot of the work fell on me. I don't mind though cause I got a lot of back and feet rubs :-). 

Our party favors. I made all 160 boxes! First, the rhinestone buckles arrived sans rhinestones. I had to individually glue the stones on there because the eBAY ad failed to mention that. Needless to say, when all was said and done, I had inhaled A LOT of glue! 

The boxes had biscottis since hubby's family is Italian. Hubby and I spent 2 days baking each and every one of the biscottis. They tasted FABULOUS but ummm...I haven't had biscottis since then. I don't plan on baking them anytime soon. 2-years later and I am still traumatized. See the end of the wedding pics for my DIY items.

The ring bearer's pillow. This was one of the easiest ones to do.

Flower girl's baskets. I made 2.

One of the pomander's.

Using PowerPoint and wax paper, I made these. They actually turned out OK.

Did the menu cards. Some were blue base with white menus and others were white base with blue menus.

The table numbers. I had to cut out each individual number and then glue the blue card stock behind them. This took some time but it wasn't hard per se.

Our signature cocktail drinks display. This was another easy one.

Wedding activity books. I made bags for the kids with crayons, glow in the dark sticks, candy and these books. The books were for drawing and coloring. 

If you haven't already guessed it by now, our colors were Tiffany blue, Silver and White with red accent colors. 

I hope you enjoyed reading this post as much as I enjoyed re-living the day. 

Saying I do, Nigerian Style...Wedding series

WARNING!!! A PRETTY LONG POST!!!

I promised to one day blog about my wedding and the day has finally come :-). I wanted to save it up for my 100th-post anniversary which coincidentally falls in line with my 1-year blog anniversary (that was not intentional).

I will be blogging about my wedding this week and next which coincidentally will be my 100th post. So sit back, relax and enjoy! I love re-living the 2 days we spent celebrating and I hope you enjoy reading as well. It feels like just yesterday.

So here is some background. This was taken from the program we handed out at our Nigerian (Yoruba) ceremony.

The Yoruba Wedding Ceremony

Marriage is an essential institution in the Yoruba culture thus the wedding is a social affair entailing elaborate ceremonies and activities. These will include, dancing, singing, performing, praying and of course, lots of food. Marriage between a man and a woman is seen as not just bringing the two people together, but also uniting two families.

Traditional marriage consists of two parts. The Introduction & The Engagement. It is now common for these two to flow into each other as they are held on the same day while the wedding ceremony for a Christian couple takes place the following day in the church. This is akin to the practice in the Biblical times when a bride is betrothed to her husband but the wedding celebration is at a future time.

The Introduction is the part of the ceremony where the groom’s family introduces themselves to the bride’s family and also makes known their intention to ask for the hand of the bride (from the bride’s family) in marriage to their son. This is done through the help of a spokesperson on both sides of the families. The spokesperson on the groom’s side is referred to as The Standing Policeman (“Olopa Iduro” in the Yoruba language). The spokesperson on the bride’s side is referred to as The Sitting Policeman (“Olopa Ijoko” in the Yoruba language). Most of the exchanges will be between The Standing Chairman and The Sitting Chairman. A proposal letter written by the groom’s family is presented to the bride’s family and in return, an acceptance letter is given to the groom’s family and the engagement follows.

The Engagement is the part where the groom’s family is expected to bring the ‘symbolic’ items listed in the engagement list given to them. This list is often agreed upon ahead of time and may include some of the following items: yams, honey, salt, fish, drinks, a suitcase of clothes for the bride, The Bible, an engagement ring, etc. Each of these items has its own significant symbolism which serves as the spring board for prayers during the ceremony. The groom will present the bride with her engagement ring. Both the bride and groom are then prayed for by the heads of both families including their parents and others appointed on each family’s behalf.

After prayers, families and friends of the bride and groom are invited to eat and dance. 

Without further ado, here are pictures from our Yoruba ceremony.

My handsome hubby (then fiance) showing off his agbada (the outfit he has on. It was hand embroided just for us in Nigeria. We LOVED the way it turned out.

Check out his new shoes bought especially for the occasion :-). Shoulda worn brown socks though...

All dolled up and ready to make my debut!

Me after I got dolled up and before I was led out by my friends.

J and his family waiting for my arrival. 

Some of my friends escorted me out dancing. They were really sweet to participate.

The family spokepersons. The lady in green was for J's side and the one in pink was for my side. J's and my family met with our individual representatives before the event. And yes, they get paid for this stuff. They were really nice though and we were glad my parents picked them.

My dad praying for me before I "left" his house to go to another. It was a powerful prayer. I love my parents so much!

Some of the "gifts" given by J's family to my family.

J's parents waiting for their bride. In our culture, the family is the one asking for the girl's hand in marriage. I am covered up here. They were asked if this was the bride the came for and of course they answered yes :-). I was then officially accepted into their family.

J with my parents. They have officially accepted him into our family.

We are one. Here J is putting a ring on it :-).

Our cake. It was quite yummy but I didn't even get a chance to have much (we shared a piece as part of the ceremony) because it was gone baby gone!

Afterwards, we danced and took pictures with friends and well wishers. You'll notice most of the guests on my side had on something gold or mustard color. That is called "aso-ebi" which means standing together. Its a way of showing that I have people behind me. You know...I've got people :-)...silly attempt at humor.

Life as an interracial couple

If you read my first blog and saw my profile picture, you'll know that J and I are an interracial couple.

It isn't something that's ever bothered me but I have noticed that it bothers others more. I grew up with a lot of diversity and was taught that we are all God's creations regardless of our race, class, age, ethnic background. We are all ONE race and its the human race.

I recall the first time J and I visited Boston, Massachusetts. I grew up there and it was nice to show J the various places I visited when I was younger and just to experience the city through his eyes.
My brother, sister in law and their 2 boys were with us and we decided to take the kids to Boston's Newbury Street.  Its a pretty cool area with lots of shops (clothing and coffee and other treats).
J and I were holding the boys and we got so many looks. What surprised me is that folks didn't look and then turn away. Nooo...they looked and just kept on looking at us as we walked by. It was slightly uncomfortable for J who hadn't experienced that before.
Notwithstanding, we had a blast in Boston! Here are a couple of pictures from our trip to Fenway.

When we got married, in April 2011, I was THRILLED to share my pictures with my co-workers especially since a lot of them expressed interest. Little did I know how much stress that would cause me.

Rumor #1:
I heard from a friend at work that the rumor is I married J so I could have light skinned babies! I was hurt by that because I LOVE all colors! My nieces and nephew are black and I love EVERYTHING about them. For someone to even think that about me meant that they thought I didn't love them and that is SOOOO far from the truth!


Rumor #2:
Another friend mentioned that they heard I married J so my kids could have "good hair". What does that even mean??? All hair is BEAUTIFUL! I love my hair and wouldn't trade it for anyone else's hair. I wish it was a little thicker but it is what I have and its mine. Rumor #2 I attributed to ignorance. 


So now, how do I react when people stare at J and I? I stare right back until they turn away! I figured unless you are smiling at me or have something nice to say, it is rude to stare!


Have you ever experienced something like that or know someone who has? How did you handle it? 

My first post! Who is JJ?

Hello,
So I have decided to start my own blog. Why? Well, for one thing, I do like to read other people's blogs so I figured its a good idea to reciprocate. Another reason is that I am starting a new journey in my life (more on that in later blogs) and would like to share my thoughts and experiences.

Who am I? Well, my name is Joy (which explains one of the "Js") and 

I am married to an awesome guy named John (explains the other "J").

For simplicity, I'll refer to hubby as "J".

About us. We met in August 2007 and got married in 2011. Yes...it took us 4-years to make it to the alter. Considering I am PHAT (Pretty Hot And Tempting), you'd think he would have proposed LOOOOOONNNNGGG before he did. But oh no...home boy took his time proposing. He asked my dad for my hand in marriage in September 2009 and asked me in December 2009.

We spent the next 16-months  learning more about each other, planning our wedding and most importantly, building our individual faith in God in order to weather the storms of life.

On April 15, 2011, we were "married" by Nigerian law and custom.

On April 16, 2011, we were joined together as man & wife by ALL laws and custom.

God has truly been faithful to us and with each passing day, we see God's hands in our lives. Incase, you haven't guessed it, our faith is also a part of who we are and we strive to live our lives in a way that pleases God.

So join me as I begin my new adventure in the blogging world.

Thanks for reading my blog!