Thursday, July 19, 2012

Life as an interracial couple

If you read my first blog and saw my profile picture, you'll know that J and I are an interracial couple.

It isn't something that's ever bothered me but I have noticed that it bothers others more. I grew up with a lot of diversity and was taught that we are all God's creations regardless of our race, class, age, ethnic background. We are all ONE race and its the human race.

I recall the first time J and I visited Boston, Massachusetts. I grew up there and it was nice to show J the various places I visited when I was younger and just to experience the city through his eyes.
My brother, sister in law and their 2 boys were with us and we decided to take the kids to Boston's Newbury Street.  Its a pretty cool area with lots of shops (clothing and coffee and other treats).
J and I were holding the boys and we got so many looks. What surprised me is that folks didn't look and then turn away. Nooo...they looked and just kept on looking at us as we walked by. It was slightly uncomfortable for J who hadn't experienced that before.
Notwithstanding, we had a blast in Boston! Here are a couple of pictures from our trip to Fenway.




When we got married, in April 2011, I was THRILLED to share my pictures with my co-workers especially since a lot of them expressed interest. Little did I know how much stress that would cause me.

Rumor #1:
I heard from a friend at work that the rumor is I married J so I could have light skinned babies! I was hurt by that because I LOVE all colors! My nieces and nephew are black and I love EVERYTHING about them. For someone to even think that about me meant that they thought I didn't love them and that is SOOOO far from the truth!


Rumor #2:
Another friend mentioned that they heard I married J so my kids could have "good hair". What does that even mean??? All hair is BEAUTIFUL! I love my hair and wouldn't trade it for anyone else's hair. I wish it was a little thicker but it is what I have and its mine. Rumor #2 I attributed to ignorance. 


So now, how do I react when people stare at J and I? I stare right back until they turn away! I figured unless you are smiling at me or have something nice to say, it is rude to stare!


Have you ever experienced something like that or know someone who has? How did you handle it? 

6 comments:

  1. Great read and beautiful pics J!

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  2. Hubs and I are also interracial. Those comments are so out of place and so wrong!

    For one marrying a white man does not guarantee that our kids will have light skin or "good" hair. It can go either way!! That is ignorance!

    I haven't had any comments or issues like this in our relationship and I hope never to have it. How awful for anyone to question your love for your husband?!

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    Replies
    1. Yeah Faith. What got me is that these are women who call themselves my friends at work. I don't spends a lot of time on my hair and one of them spends a lot of time telling me about what she does to make her hair look nice. So for her to turn around and say something like that about me was truly shocking. But I do attribute it to ignorance.
      J & I will love our kids regardless of the color of their skin or texture of their hair.
      I am glad you and your hubby have never experienced it and I pray you never do.

      Delete
  3. Ah people and their comments. You can't escape those. We've never experienced anything like that but then again we live in a very diverse area where it's far too common to see interracial couples.

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  4. I am just finding this blog.....Those two co-workers are idiots who are probably jealous of your happiness. To think that you would marry for love doesn't make sense to them. I'm sure the color of your children's skin or the texture of their hair was not on the list of why you love your husband. They need to be educated about life and love.

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  5. Found you through your comment on my page! As you can see we are an interracial couple as well and we have DEFINITELY experienced it. My husband is from the south and we lived in the south for 5yrs together.. I never let it bother me, in fact I did the same as you I stared back and followed it with a "well? what are you looking at??" or I would snuggle in good to his side so there was no doubt we were together, LOL!! I'm kind of a "stinker" like that ha! I don't pay folks any mind now.. I have never had people comment to my face or say anything about why we married, probably has been said behind my back though.. As long as NO ONE has anything to say to my son we are A-OK.. If so then that's a whole 'nother story! Off to catch up on your blog now! :)

    ReplyDelete

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